hot as balls

i stroll out of my air-conditioned office, onto the sidewalk and quickly hop into my car.  my black exterior, black leather interior, adorable little vehicle.  which happens to have become a hellish oven over the course of the past few weeks.

i close the door and my glasses immediately fog up.  sweet.  i awkwardly find my way to insert the key into the ignition and i head in reverse.  i crank the air conditioning and feel the refreshing 85 degree air.  my feet are now slippery inside my black patent-leather peep toe heels.  i can feel my hair sticking to the back of my neck.  

damn.  it's hot as balls.  i'm ready for christmas.

i'm ready for cooler weather in which i can wear pants with silky lining.  weather in which i can sit down without worrying about tush sweat.  in which i can apply my light make-up in the morning without worrying about it melting down to my neck by the end of the day.  shave my legs only a few times a week?  yes, please.

i'm ready to layer clothing.  to drink coffee or red wine without wanting to throw up, to enjoy food above room temperature.  i'm ready to open my darn windows back up at home without fear of melting my dog.

don't get me wrong.  i fully realize i will bitch even longer about the extreme cold if it ever finally hits my area.  but until then, bring on the cold front.