eating out

i like to do it in public.  with a fork, a knife, and sometimes a spoon.  napkins are essential, and i generally appreciate wine to begin the experience.

if you began reading this post with a dirty mind, shame on you.  i'm talking about restaurants.


reviewing my personal spending habits, it is more than obvious that i unload a majority of my paycheck on food and beverage-related experiences.  i'm not talking about bar hopping or fast-food, i'm talking about read the reviews, try it out, fall in love dining experiences.

i rationalize as follows: i easily spend $40-50 when shopping for foodstuffs at earthfare if i prepare a meal at home.  that $20 entree is a bargain!  plus, i'm supporting the local economy.  score.

and so i dine out.  and i'm addicted.

i can't get enough of new ambiances and warm environments.  i love to peruse the menus, nibbling on their signature appetizers and sipping my wine.

my boyfriend judges restaurants based on the quality of the bread provided prior to a meal.  i judge the experience.  and i judge it critically.

i want to see wood.  i want to see glass and leather.  i want to see candles and hear music.  i want to see creative entree titles and enticing meal descriptions.  i want options.

i am most critical of service.

allowing for the fact that i drink like a famished desert-dweller, i find no excuse for not keeping my water glass half full.  don't allow me to taste your beers on tap prior to selection?  you're losing points.  don't know how to at least attempt to describe your wine menu options to me?  you're in trouble.

i want your recommendations, dear server.  not that i'll actually order your favorite, but let me see some passion for the food you dish out.  i want to hear about the ingredients, learn about the technique, and understand why your restaurant has a soul.  if you have no soul, we have a problem.

don't seat me at a table in the corner.  and please do not seat me just beside the door.  i don't have a communicable disease, and i'm not in a rush.  are you?

i have dreams of the angus barn vegetable plate.  it's worth every penny.  and the experience conjured when paired with a leather lounge chair and rutherford merlot is delectable.

the vegan sex at irregardless speaks for itself, and speaks to me from the menu.

acme's pickled beet, goat cheese and arugula dish is delightful.  their scallops are perfect.

as i debate my spending habits, i recall the lasting memories cultivated in these culinary settings.  meaningful conversation and fantastic secrets shared over creative dishes and under perfect lighting to suit the mood.  restaurants, good restaurants, are to me like a mini vacation.  and i think this is good for the soul.

i'll penny pinch elsewhere.  i'm a fan of eating out.