finding contentment in old friends

new friends are fun.  new friends are exciting, open to hear all of your old stories, full of new stories you've never heard before, and not yet tired of your bad habits or over-the-top personality.  you think they're great, they think you're great, and before you know it you have a "friend crush" (definition: new obsession with an individual involving zero romantic interest whatsoever).  then you get to the plateau period of friendship...their stories have gotten old to you - and yours to them.  your chats are no longer so interesting, you've got each other fairly "figured out", and the shimmer of a brand spankin' new friendship has become a dull residue.  what happens next?  

sometimes those relationships just fade off into the distance.  you love bumping into each other, but they become more like that funky dress in the back of your closet that you never do get rid of because, some day, you just might be in the mood to wear it again, if only for fun.

less often, you take that relationship, put in some elbow grease and make it gleam again.  with some routine maintenance (doesn't take a lot of effort if you don't let it get too rusty), your previously fun new relationship is on track to be a long-term and important part of your life.  an old, fantastic friend to love.  if you take good care of it, it'll take good care of you.  returning to the closet theme, i'd compare it to a favorite pair of yoga pants.  mine are black and accompany me everywhere from bed, to the gym, and (gasp) even out to a casual dinner.  sometimes you forget about them for a while...your new articles of clothing distract you for a while until you are digging through your closet for something comfortable that fits well.  as soon as you put them back on, you remember why you loved them so much in the first place...and sometimes you wear them until the darn things HAVE to go into the wash.  

the great thing about old friends is that the good ones don't wear out.  they adjust and change right along with you, only getting stronger as you share life experiences.  i have found, personally, that the great ones don't even require a lot of upkeep.  the essence of who you and your friend are doesn't change.  without a doubt, the less important attributes of each of you will...perhaps they meet someone new, they'll clearly be influenced.  they pick up new hobbies and interests, which the two of you may not share.  but the inner core of a person is where old friendships are rooted, and the great thing about roots is that they're tough suckers able to grow in lots of different directions.

one of the ultimate senses of fulfillment and contentment in my life comes just after a good catch-up session with an old friend.